When planning a loved one’s funeral, many people worry about getting it right. A recent UK study surveyed those who had been involved in organising a funeral. Three key factors stood out as being most important: the tone of the service felt right, the funeral accurately reflected the person who had died, and there was a meaningful opportunity for everyone to say goodbye.
Setting the Right Tone
Every person is unique, and so is the way we say goodbye. There is no right or wrong—what matters is that the tone of the service feels right and honours the person in a way that brings comfort. Whether it’s a light-hearted farewell full of stories and laughter or a more traditional and solemn gathering, the right tone is the one that feels most authentic to those mourning the loss.
A Funeral Should Reflect the Person It’s Honouring
A funeral is a final tribute, and making it feel personal is often the most important part for those saying goodbye. Whether that means incorporating a loved one’s favourite music, sharing heartfelt stories, or holding the service in a place that meant something to them, there are many ways to ensure their personality and values shine through. No two funerals should ever feel the same because no two lives are the same. Thoughtfully chosen elements can help create a ceremony that truly represents the person being honoured.
Giving Everyone the Chance to Say Goodbye
A funeral is a rare and significant moment when family and friends come together to acknowledge loss and support one another. It provides a space for your loved one’s broader circle to say the goodbyes that are needed, in whatever way feels right. A well-planned ceremony ensures people walk away feeling they’ve had the chance to bear witness to the loss and said their farewell.
Honouring Last Wishes
Its so important that families have the freedom to make their own choices and don’t feel restricted in what they can and can’t do when organising a funeral or memorial. Another aspect I have found to be extremely important to bereaved families is making sure they fulfil any last wishes their loved one may have had to the best of their ability. It’s one of the very fist things we discuss at a planning meeting: did your person leave any instructions?
For many, a funeral feels like the last thing they can do for their loved one. It’s important to feel that it was done well, that it truly honoured their life, and that it provided comfort to those left behind. A well-thought-out ceremony helps families walk away feeling that they got it right—that the service was a fitting tribute, reflecting the love and respect held for the person who has passed. For those navigating this process, working with a thoughtful and experienced celebrant can make all the difference in creating a meaningful farewell.
